What You're in For ...

So I realized today that a ton, a TON, of people I know have either just had, are about to have or have just found out that they're going to have a baby.  People I know in real life and people I know in the blog world.  I also realized that a lot of people have NO idea (I know I sure as heck didn't) about what they're "in for".  When you first find out you're pregnant you fantasize about what you'll name your little love, whether it is a boy or girl love, how you'll decorate the love's nursery and all the darling things you'll dress your love in.  What you DON'T know (or aren't prepared for) is what you're actually "in for".  And how trivial, although fun, that stuff actually is.  So here goes.

First and foremost, love.  LOVE.  You have no idea how much you can love something.  And at the same time, you have NO idea how much worry IMMEDIATELY attacks you like a ton of bricks.  You will worry about everything.  To the point that it will make you naseous and physically feel sick.  I deal with this on a DAILY basis and DAILY I have to say "Lord, he is YOURS.  You have intrusted us with this precious little gift, to raise him and nurture him.  To encourage him and let him know he can do and be anything and everything that he wants but in the end, he is YOURS and I trust You.  I trust You and Your promises to me and I trust YOU with him."  And let me tell you ladies that ain't easy.  But you have to.  HAVE TO.  Or it will (and I know from experience) literally eat. you. alive.  And that's exactly what the devil wants, for it to steal all your joy and the amazing time that you have for a moment while they're in this precious phase of baby-hood.  So don't let him.  I fight every day to not let him.

Second, exhaustion.  At first mainly.  Physically, emotionally, spiritually.  You will struggle with exhaustion in every way possible.  Good news is the physical one gets better.  After the first few months of struggling with "OMG I love this little angel so much but if he doesn't go to sleep RIGHT now I think I might lose my mind!" you one day look up and go "OMG he is SLEEPING.  And sleeping well!  Is this a joke?  Where's the hidden camera?"  And the emotional and spiritual ones get better too, but those you have to take an active role in working on.  Which plays into what I talked about above.

Third, advice.  From everyone.  Everywhere.  All the time.  This can be a great thing, don't get me wrong.  When. you. ask. for it.  But when people feel the need to tell you "you aren't feeding them enough" or "you're feeding him too much" or "he should be in his bed already" or "he's not sleeping 12 hours?"  IGNORE IT.  Especially with breastfeeding.  If it works for you, GREAT, but if it doesn't DO NOT STRESS ABOUT IT.  People will make you feel like you are feeding your child knives if you decide to go to formula.  It's absolutely ridiculous.  It's not for everyone.  Yes, it's better for the baby and in all honesty if it worked for me I'd still be doing it right now.  But if your supply gets low or you just CAN'T get them to latch after trying everything that EVERYONE has suggested (and I mean everyone), it is going to be okay.  Formula is not liquid poison.  You are their mother.  Forgive me if I'm wrong but you carried and birthed your baby, correct?  So I'll go with the fact that you know what's best for them.  End of story.

Fourth, you have to smile.  Smile when you're exhausted.  Smile when they're being adorable.  Smile when you have NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE DOING.  Shoot, even smile when you've tried everything you can think possible to make them stop fussing and they won't.  Because it will be gone in a flash.  And they'll be 16, asking if they can borrow your car and you'll give anything to be holding them trying to soothe them from crying.

Fifth, throw your sense of style out the window.  Because even if you do have time to think about making yourself look presentable, you'll spend it making ridiculous faces and voices at your little love and then it will be time to feed, change, fill-in-the-blank, them again.  Maybe give yourself one night.  One night when you know you'll have a sitter or are going out with your mister, to make yourself presentable.  Otherwise?  Invest in some really cute workout/comfy clothes gear and hats (you'll FO SHO not have time to wash, dry and heaven forbid, STRAIGHTEN your hair).   Because it's all you'll wear.  And you'll love it.

Beyond that, take it day by day.  And enjoy it.  I know I'm only about 4 months in and NO EXPERT WHATSOEVER, but this is my experience with my little love.  And I'm lovin' every minute.